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Dealing with Insecurity – Easy How-to steps


Insecurity. No not the one that has to deal with terrorism and danger that President Buhari cannot stop talking about.

Insecurity in this context means the feeling of being Insecure; not being comfortable or confident in ones self or in a situation.

Believe it or not, many people are battling with insecurity.

They feel uncomfortable about their looks, their financial status, marital or relationship status. There are quite a number of other things which might even be too ridiculous to think of that actually make people feel insecure. A lot of people do not know this but, how you feel about yourself affects almost everything about you, it affects the way you relate with people and how people treat you.

It would be really hard to treat someone like a queen or king when the person feels he/she is a servant and treats themselves as one.

In summary, if you treat yourself like crap people will treat you like crap

Its high time you snap out of your insecurity.

You’re pretty enough, you’re tall enough, it’s okay if you’re not lightskinned like that, you are still beautiful. Your job is good enough and a lot of people will kill to have that job. You may not be married now, but you will get married one day. You are loved and you have enough money.

But first, you have to fix yourself. Come to peace with yourself. You’re not supposed to be perfect, no one really is, we all have our flaws no matter how big or little they are. You feel you’re fat? Well yes you are, love your body, do you know how many people would kill to be fat? Do you know how many people you’re fatter than that envy you?

I know it’s easier said than done, but here are a few steps you can actually take to work on your insecurity

You have to accept you have a problem, ask yourself why you do not feel comfortable  about yourself or your situation.

Try to let go of all the things that make you lack confidence in yourself and focus on the good things about you.

Stop being so damned negative all the time.

“Hey you look good today” deserves a “Thank you very much”

Not a scoff and an “Abeg, as ugly as I am?”

Believe it or not, people are actually uglier than you, so if there is a chance someone finds you attractive, be your biggest fan and agree and say thanks! Your confidence even makes you look better!

Stop comparing yourself!!!!

Just stop it, you’re not Beyonce, you can never be Trey Songs, you are you and you should be proud of yourself. (Ehm..that is except, you actually are Beyonce or Trey Songs reading this post. In that case, Good day and welcome. Can I get your autograph?)

Don’t even let people compare you to someone or something else, “Ahh if you were..”

“Well I’m not, and thank God! Cause I love me!”

Don’t let anyone compare you.

You’re good enough the way you are!

Instead of looking at your weaknesses; things that only hinder you, focus on your strengths.

Sweety, no one cares if Bill Gates is ugly or tall or what not. We all know he has a ton of money. Now if he focused so much on his insecurities he would have told himself, “Nah, what is a short ugly broke unintelligent guy like me trying to do with computers” ( I’m not saying he’s ugly or short ooh) but instead, he focused on what he could do and made himself better.

No one cares about your flaws when you’re a success. (Well, haters will of course care, but who the hell cares about them right?)

Everyone has a talent, look for yours and work hard at it.

Since you feel so bad about something you might not be able to change. You can change this one. You can be the best fashion designer ever, or doctor or astronaut or a rocket scientist.

There is absolutely nothing wrong with being different and you have to realize that

Being different is what makes everyone special. Imagine how the world would be if we could all do the same things or feel the same way at the same time. Embrace your difference.

It’s okay to be criticized

Criticism actually even make us better people. So try not to be bothered about criticism, what really matters is what you think about yourself (which should be that you’re spectacular). Don’t let people confuse you with all their criticism, it’s really your life. So if you feel something someone has to say will make you better, do it because you want to. Not because you were criticized.

Now remember, no one is perfect, we all have flaws, you’re better than a lot of people, remember that and always know you’re worthy of success, of being beautiful inside and out, of love. Be satisfied with your looks, your status. If you want to be better be that because you want to, not because you think it would boast your confidence.

Also,never speak negatively about yourself, you might start to believe it and it would work against you.

Be positive!

I am, @Lord__Nina

Views expressed are only those of the authors.

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